This time last year I wrote about new year resolutions, taking control and how this links with values and beliefs.
Have a quick read or the rest of this won’t make sense.
“It’s that time of the year when we think about resolutions. This year, why not take back control with this simple exercise:
Spending no more than five minutes; think about your achievements over the past year and write them down under these five headings:
Personal, Family, Friends, Community, Work.
“Star” the ones you’re most proud of.
Now invest time reflecting on these questions:
- Do any of the columns look overly full / empty? (is there a balance?)
- How much choice / control did you have over doing these things?
- Are your “starred” items where you’d want them to be?
- Is this what you expected?
- Is this what you want?
Now create a fresh five columns and write things into each that you want to be there when you do this exercise in twelve months time. Star the most important things.
These are your goals for next year and the starred things are your priorities.
By doing this simple exercise you’ve taken the first step in understanding what’s important to you and establishing control and balance in your life. The more of these things you actively do, the greater your sense of well being will be over the coming year.
It’s January next week, so its time to think about which of your goals you want to achieve over your first few months and to plan in your priorities across the year NOW! Some will be one off things others will be ongoing.
Once you’ve done this, set a reminder to review this list once a month; to review progress, check on your balance and to add, remove and plan things in.
Lastly, share your list with a trusted friend or partner. By doing this you’ll help drive commitment.
So, your new year resolution could be to take (or remain in) control. The way you’ll do this is by understanding your goals and prioritising the most important things. The way you’ll know you’re being successful is by reviewing and ticking those things off as you achieve them or by understanding what is stopping you and taking action.
Best of all though, you’ll feel more in control with a greater sense of wellbeing.
I’ve been reviewing how I did vs what I set out last year and have concluded that I’ve done OK, but think that I could, and maybe should, have done better.
My main observation is that achieving things in my “personal” column were a definite poor relation compared to things in other columns. The good news is that the things in my “family” column were in much healthier balance this year.
So, my reflection now moves to “why” is the balance as it is… and this is where I start to think about my values and beliefs, which ultimately influence and drive my choices and behaviour. Only then can I really answer the question “Have I been in control over the last year?” which actually ends up being “how much control have I had last year”
Having done this I can now tweak and change my focus and behaviour to help ensure that the right things are in my columns and that in 2020 (and hopefully beyond) I continue to grow and to improve the balance of all these competing things which contribute to me achieving my ‘personal purpose’ and maintaining a good level of wellbeing.